Answered Prayer

Highlights:

1. Zoe came home Saturday afternoon after spending 11 days at Children's.

2. Zoe had no success with the External Ventricular Drain, so an internal shunt was placed on Thursday.

3. We have been provided with housing adjacent to CHB!!

4. Our dear friend, Becky, is here!!! She is staying with us for 2 weeks!!

I began writing this on Wednesday, October 12th and am just now finishing it on Sunday, October 16th. I've been enjoying a nap here and there, working the phones, organizing my Cancer notebook, and preparing our home for Zoe's arrival.

Our dog, Bella, and our son, Camden, enjoyed Wednesday at aunt Tammy's house with her dogs and little Andre. Because of this all-day playdate, I was able to spend the day with Zoe so that David could work.

During the acute phase of learning of Zoe's disease, going through surgery, and suffering through the long hospital stay that revealed one complication after another, I developed a negative perspective of what the coming year of treatment would entail. I envisioned Zoe's precious time being squandered away in cramped hospital rooms waiting for test results, receiving chemotherapy, and hearing Zoe pine to be freed of lines and leads so she could play with her friends. I saw myself sharing her hospital bed, looking down on her, grieving what should have been, and feeding a growing resentment of what is.

Spending the day with her today allowed me to see that it is possible to have a blast right here in room 904A. She, still with tubes coming out of her brain and chest, stuck foam butterfly stickers to a dolphin balloon and gave a cheerful, "Hi!" to everyone as they passed by her bed. We practiced the alphabet, sang songs, and read our favorite stories. Intermittently, of course, we hosted doctors, got a blood transfusion, played communication tag (Neurosurgeon: "Oh, you'll have to check with Oncology." Oncologist: "Well, we're waiting for neurosurgery."), cleaned up vomit, and tried to remove the portacatheter dressing as painlessly as possible. After every painful, scary, crying fit, Zoe never fails to say, "Thank you! Good job!" to those of us causing her distress. It has been eight days of lying on her back, yet this toddler's psychological health seems none the worse for wear.

Another concern that weighed on my heart as I looked ahead at the consuming nature of this protocol was losing time together as a family and how potentially damaging that can be under stress of this magnitude. The four of us have rarely been together since Camden was a week old. If we were to spend the next year "as ships passing in the night," then communication issues, mistakes in administering medicines, and interpersonal conflicts could mount, and both Zoe and our marriage would suffer. I prayed that the Lord would resolve this concern for me, and He has!

My mother's childhood friend's son's wife (follow that?) knew someone who knew someone who called the Director of Social Work at Children's, and within an hour we had a three month booking right around the corner from CHB!!!!! The family who created this housing is from Londonderry, NH, and their story is quite inspiring (http://www.devonshouse.org/background.html). This housing will be available to us throughout Zoe's daily radiation treatment, and there is free handicap parking,so this is an enormous benefit to us (no commuting issues; no parking fees at night; able to see each member of the family every day).

When I returned home from visiting Zoe in the hospital last week, I received a phone call that one of my friend's brother's best friends is the President of the New Balance shoe company, and he offered to provide a luxurious, conveniently located hotel room for us for the next couple of weeks so that, during Zoe's very vulnerable phase between chemotherapy treatments, we can be close to Dana-Farber Cancer Institute for tests. This is both a logistical blessing, as well as a treat. Since I haven't really seen David in two months, I'm personally looking forward to some form of date night, even if it's just walking from the hotel to the nearest Starbucks. Oh, and I bet you're wondering where, exactly, the children would be during said date night: Becky's here!!!!! Another answer to prayer!!!!!!!

Presently, as I conclude this entry, it is a stunning fall day. My daughter is cuddling with her father who is chatting lightheartedly with a friend (no talk of complications, treatments, fevers...). My son is swinging away, sleeping in the sun. Becky just made me a sensational salad for my "lunch" (It's 4pm; I forgot to eat lunch.) This is a wonderful moment that I fully appreciate.